She Turned Him Into A Newt (And He Didn't Get Better) Gingrich

Here's dinosaur who is attempting to scrape and scratch up out of the slime-pit of political irrelevance: Newt. He's a lizard of very little difference. The short version is that these guys like RL and Rupert Murdoch's Foxpack and Newt Grime-Grinch want to tar the Democrats with anything dark and sticky -- the truth be damned. They will even pull out ideas that are sixty years old, like McCarthyism. This last week Newt has been marshaling the stupid troops and attempting to fire up the base (is there an election anywhere in sight?) with all kinds of hate toward his political opponents -- yeah, I know, that's what politicians tend to do. No big whoop.

Unless. . . unless what? Obama is a socialist after all, right? Right? Er, left? Unless there is a giant problem with this whole notion of their being a political left anywhere in America.

See, words ought to mean something. If Newt or anybody else wants to attack Obama for being a socialist, there really ought to be some content to the term.

What Newt is trying to say is exceedingly simple (go figure). Obama is Lenin, or Stalin, or Satan. It's a lot of fun that he can say this and not say it at the same time. (He'd have his cake and eat it too but Rush ain't sharing any of the cake. Just look at that fat bastard, I mean, really, this stuff writes itself!) Using the real words would make it easier for us all to see how stupid this rancid Republican rhetoric really is. If Newt and the other GOP guppies were to say that Obama is about to make us the United Soviets of America, people might start to think about the alleged reality of this statement. That might lead to, you know, reading history . . . Think of the carnage!

Is there any fact to this assertion that Obama is attempting to usher in European socialism? Well, first, we have to put a few more words in Newt's mouth so we can get some sense out of the big dope. Newt seems to be saying by European socialism that we should think Marxism. That's socialism as in one of the esses in U.S.S.R. So the implication is clear: hate Obama or there go all your rights. You think it's bad now? Well, we could be having the same situation as they have in France or the UK -- they're socialists, right? I mean, England is part of Mother Russia, no? Um, no. Or, they're about to become pals of Putin, no? Um, well. You know.

Anybody who knows anything about history, or who has perhaps read Richard Pipes monumental book on the Russian Revolution can tell you that there was never any threat that communists (it means the same thing as socialist, technically) were about to take over the United States. Yeah, there were spies, but there was about to be a revolution in America. It was all paranoia. A war with Russia was more likely and that wasn't very likely, as history demonstrated.

Communism only ever took root in Russia and China. These places had a lot in common with each other and very little in common with America of the 1950s. As far as European socialism, whatever we decide that is, that too is unlikely to be traipsed in by Mr. Obama or anybody else. It would require our tax structure to be completely overhauled, and that is not about to happen anytime soon.

Not in the next four years, anyway. That's about as close to a guarantee as you can get in politics.